Posted on Thursday, October 31, 2013
in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values
This week I’m focusing on five listening moments.
Monday was Listening to Understand
Tuesday was Listen Deeply
Wednesday was Listen Beneath The Surface
Too often I thought I knew what someone was going to say. Too often I’ve made wrong assumptions, flawed judgments and drawn the wrong conclusions. I’m well intentioned, but I unfortunately T.R.I.P. and stumble and hurt others.
The acronym T.R.I.P. is a warning to me to be a better listener; maybe it will help you too.
T – Listen Tenderly
R – Listen Respectfully
I – Listen to avoid Ignorance
P – Listen, be Patient
Posted on Tuesday, October 29, 2013
in How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values
A year and a half ago I wrote the very popular 9 Consequences Of Not Listening.
This week I’d like to highlight five listening moments.
Monday was Listening to Understand
Listening, really listening, makes a huge difference in our relationships.
– We hear more of what’s being said
– We quiet our need to be in control
– The speaker feels more lovable as we pay attention
– We assure the speaker feels worthwhile as we listen
– Our self-respect grows as we commend ourselves as capable listeners
We’re gonna finish this week on mysilentscream with an insightful poem by Chris Whitford.
Hope licked its salty lips
And hung close as we both kissed
The lovely hearts of the amazing people
The hearts I keep close to me
In case the hope goes right through me
The hope of TreeHouse is an amazing thing
So don’t give up hope, no, don’t give up heart
Don’t leave this love in shards
Because the hate will eat you alive
But together we can strive
And be the best we can be
They even see the best in me
Posted on Thursday, August 8, 2013
in Emotional, Music, Relational, Social, Values
As you begin reading today, give Evanescence’s song “What You Want” a listen.
I asked some friends at TreeHouse, “What line stands out? Why that one?”
My friends Erin, Gabe, and Kelly liked:
Do what you, what you want
If you have a dream for better
Erin and Gabe agreed, “I like doing what I want.” Kelly added, “If you want to do something, don’t let people hold you back from doing something good.”
Stand and face the unknown (got to remember who you really are)
Posted on Wednesday, August 7, 2013
in Education, Emotional, Relational, Social, TreeHouse, Values
Do you know someone who really works hard at being someone else?
We all do.
Maybe it’s me.
Maybe it’s you.
I have been that person.
When I was in high school I sometimes felt desperate for friends. When I was included – even for a moment – I would try to blend in.
One night I had a guy tell me, “you’re like a chameleon.”
It was true.
I tried to fit in.
I would even try to talk and act like others.
The truth is, I seldom was really accepted.
Not by them.
And not by me.
Posted on Saturday, August 3, 2013
A few years ago my wife introduced me to Sarah Young’s writing. In 2004 Thomas Nelson published Jesus Calling.
Jesus Calling is a book of daily inspiration written from the perspective of Jesus Christ speaking to the reader. My wife likes it so much she has given away several copies.
Eventually her enthusiasm led me to download a copy.
I’m not a daily Jesus Calling reader, but I’m almost never disappointed when I take the time to read Sarah’s writing. Today in particular her words challenged me and my sense of humor.
Watch Your Words Diligently
Posted on Tuesday, April 2, 2013
in Emotional, How To, Social, TreeHouse, Values
Recently I sat among a group of people all of whom respected one another. We share some common goals. We share some common hopes and dreams. While we were discussing those goals and hopes and dreams, one person spoke up.
The room of people turned.
We looked and listened.
She is well-respected.
She is respect-worthy.
She has a very respected legacy.
She is a leader among leaders.
And, in this group of people:
When she spoke people listened.
When she led people followed.
When she thought out-loud people agreed.
And, when she had a misguided suggestion there was buy-in.
Posted on Tuesday, November 13, 2012
in Emotional, How To, Relational, Spiritual, Values
This weekend at Anika’s baby dedication we shared parenting advice with the new parents Angi & Aaron.
My wife Amy said, “If you screw up, fess up.”
She elaborated, “when you make mistakes admit them.”
Unfortunately, Amy learned that lesson from my…umm…from me.
You see, I’ve had to fess up a lot.
When I Mismanage My Life I Neglect My Highest Priorities
When I have mismanaged my life it’s my wife and God who get cheated. Sadly, I take for granted those who love me the most. I haven’t rejected my faith in God, I’ve just gotten so busy that I have not included God in my thoughts, feelings and plans as often as I would prefer.
Subtitled, “Discovering The Divine Desire Beneath Sexual Struggle”, Michael John Cusick begins with an abrupt and compelling question, “What’s Better than Porn?” He spends the majority of the rest of the book answering that question.
“You and I were created to fly. But something has gone terribly wrong…Adam and Eve lost their innocence and…barely a day goes by that I don’t hear a story about a man losing his (innocence) in exchange for pornography…(and) the losses are devastating.”