Date rape is real, it’s tragic, and sometimes it’s very confusing.

This is a fictional account that’s written – based on true stories – to give words to those who are scared, silent, and silenced.

Yesterday’s account was written from a female’s perspective entitled “Her Story“.
Today’s account is from the male’s perspective.

I met this girl online.

Date rape is real, it’s tragic, and sometimes it’s very confusing.

This is a fictional account that’s written – based on true stories – to give words to those who are scared, silent, and silenced.

Today’s account was written from a female’s perspective.
Tomorrow’s account is from the male’s perspective entitled “His Story.”

It’s Valentines Day week and I have news for you: If you’re single and not dating there is nothing, nothing, nothing wrong with you!

Stop feeling defective.
Stop feeling incomplete.
Stop feeling not-good-enough.

You were created, born, and are now and always, lovable, capable and worthwhile.

This week I want to bless you and remind of of those realities.

I also want to give you – dating or not – some FREE fun ideas to share with a friend or friends.

Active Choices

My friend and co-worker at TreeHouse LeAndra Williams has a great spin on friendship. So, LeAndra, take it away!

“After many years and different friendships I have come to a place in my life to recognize helpful and hurtful friends. I have had the privilege to experience both.”

Lee, what have you learned?

“The first step to recognize if you have helpful or hurtful friend is to see which category your friend fits in. Friends are usually in one of these categories. A friend is either an Adder, a Subtracter, a Multiplier, or a Divider.”

Let me explain:

I’m reading Charles Dickens’ A Tale of Two Cities.  It’s been a hard book to read; lots of pain.

“If you hear in my voice — I don’t know that it is so, but I hope it is — if you hear in my voice any resemblance to a voice that once was sweet music in your ears, weep for it, weep for it!

If you touch, in touching my hair, anything that recalls a beloved head that lay on your breast when you were young and free, weep for it, weep for it!

Unconditional love, unfailing love (as the Bible calls it) or “love without strings” as we call it at TreeHouse is a rare & precious commodity.

A commodity that you and I can increase.

To paraphrase Leo Buscaglia, “A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be herself or himself
– to laugh with me, but never at me;
– to cry with me, but never because of me;
– to love life,
– to love yourself,
– to love being loved.
Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart.” 1

During our visit with Eric and Jill Lacher we marveled at their love.

Though they have similar hearts and values, they began their relationships with very different strategies for living out those values.

During our visit they shared with us that the wisdom of Emerson Eggerichs has helped them to grow deeper in love and express it more effectively to one another. On their behalf and to our benefit here’s some of what they learned.

How Does a Husband Spell Love to His Wife?

We need wisdom.
We need clarity.

We need accountability.
We need to stop pretending.

We need to admit we need others.
We need someone to be honest with us.

We need to pull our head out of…
We need to shut down the machine we use to crank out “I can handle this alone.”

We Need Perspective

Usually when we’re worried or upset
that we start trying to force it, to fake it, to “make it happen,”
then things start falling apart;
it’s because we’ve lost perspective.

I believe almost all mysilentscream readers want to have good friends, and be a good friend.

Last week I spent time with my two longest-term best friends, Steve and Murph. While spending time in and easy conversation with old friends I was reminded what a treasure they are to me.

I also was reminded how often I take them and our friendships for granted.

I hope that you have less regrets in your friendships. Maybe this assessment will help you evaluate how good of a friend you are. As you take it I hope that you
– Feel encouraged that you have some helpful friendship skills
– Find some strategies that aren’t helping you or your friends

Do you relate like you value honesty?

I guess it’s true what they say, you can’t trust anyone
Because no matter how much someone can mean to you
There isn’t anyone that you can find in life who hasn’t lied
Whether once or many times, it doesn’t matter
We all do it and we are all to blame
No one is perfect but is anyone really innocent?
We are people and we find ways to have our fun
Some are sick and twisted and get what they want
And some are just trying to be happy
And it’s true, we don’t think ahead… 1