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Mar 25


Posted on Wednesday, March 25, 2015 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

395px-Korean_Traffic_sign_(Detour_P-Turn).svg“I don’t know why I’m telling you this…” and the story continues.

Don’t get me wrong, I love their trust. I love your trust.

I’m honored to share your joys and your sorrows. To hear the details of the journey you’re on complete with proud smiles and guilty smirks, pain-filled glances or a losing fight to hold back the tears. Or, sadly, the flat affect from being so worn down by the long list of past pains.

I just wish there weren’t so many detours.


Mar 11

Care Is A Verb

Posted on Wednesday, March 11, 2015 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

IMG_4778As you may know, when I was younger one of my best friends said to me, “common sense is not common to you,” and he was right. He didn’t know the whole story, I was young and even more reckless than he realized

These days I’m learning not to do stupid things. I knew I was supposed to do good things, but I didn’t really think about why I should.

Then, years ago I read in my Bible, “Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.” 1

Mar 9

Life Is Short

Posted on Monday, March 9, 2015 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

001_1This is a picture of my friends Tiffany and Barry. I’ll see Barry next month. I last saw Tif in 1991.

Tiffany, Kris, Jenny, Eric, Rajjon, Adam, John, Beng, and Tyler, all TreeHouse teens. All gone. Way too soon.

Life Is Short

This is post is part of a series entitled “10 for 25.” It’s about ten lessons – most of them hard lessons to learn – that I’ve learned over my twenty-five years at TreeHouse.

Life is short. Our time with loved ones is never guaranteed.

Mar 4

Be Yourself

Posted on Wednesday, March 4, 2015 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, TreeHouse, Values

Untitled-TrueColor-47In the movie Batman Begins, Henri Ducard tells Bruce Wayne: You traveled the world now you must journey inwards to what you really fear; it’s inside you there is no turning back…If you make yourself more than just a man, if you devote yourself to an ideal, you become something else entirely. Are you ready to begin?

Beginnings are important. Yesterday I began a series called “10 for 25.” It’s a series of ten lessons I have learned in my twenty-five years at TreeHouse.


Mar 3

Expect the Unexpected

Posted on Tuesday, March 3, 2015 in Education, Emotional, Relational, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

Untitled-TrueColor-23I’m in the midst of a ten-month curriculum re-write and most of my writing time and energy has been focused on that project rather than #mysilentscream. That said, when TreeHouse graciously offered to throw me an “open house” to celebrate my 25th anniversary at TreeHouse I began to think beyond the present and reflect on the past.

In the past twenty-five years I’ve learned an incredible amount about myself, my family, my friends, the staff I serve alongside and the teens and parents that we serve. As I thought about it I decided to think through ten important lessons I learned in those twenty five years. This series is called “10 in 25.”

Feb 11

Better Than A Job

Posted on Wednesday, February 11, 2015 in Emotional, Relational, Values

heart - daisyI love my job. I love being employed. I hope that you have satisfying and meaningful work. This is not an essay for simplicity nor against having a job. This is a tribute to a friend giving up a great job for a great woman.

Awww if you want, it’s true.

It’s a risk.

It’s a sacrifice.

No job is “perfect”; hence without problems.
No relationship is “perfect” nor problem-free.

But, if you have the chance to build a lifelong love with someone while working a mundane job OR work a great job to return home lonely or to a contentious home, which would you choose?

Nov 20

Poetic Art

Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2014 in Emotional, Relational, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

pinkThis coming weekend I will be on a retreat. The images I’m featuring on #mysilentscream this week will be from works of “art” I created on various TreeHouse staff retreats.

I might struggle with painting and drawing, aesthetics and having an eye, but since I was in high school poetic words came more easily.

I learned to put words on paper
That reached deep into my creative soul

Within the frame of eternity
The poet wrote the verse
A gift to one and another
Revealed but thought perverse
Broken, bleeding, stripped, exposed
Our God hung humiliated
Unbound, unburied, freed from pain of death
Heaven’s poet stretched and celebrated

Oct 29

10k Wedding-Day Anniversary

Posted on Wednesday, October 29, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Music, Relational, Social, Values

10kWeddingDayJune 13, 1987, that’s our wedding day.

My wife and I have a monthly tradition to celebrate all “13th” of the month.

Like most couples we celebrate our anniversary each year.

Today we’re adding another tradition I hope happens again.

We’re now celebrating every 10,000 days too. =)

Today is our 10k-wedding-day anniversary!

10K ?

When I was a kid I hated math homework, but, over the years I’ve learned that I love math. Now, my favorite part of following sports is the analytics. 1

Oct 28

Save Me by Staind

Posted on Tuesday, October 28, 2014 in Emotional, Music, Relational, Social, Spiritual

“Just save me … from all that I am.”

“Save me” is a phrase I can relate to, both in a theological sense, but also to be saved from the consequences of misdeeds, misguided decisions, relational disappointments and circumstantial despair.

“Just save me … from all that I am” is a plea of the broken. Like a displaced broken bone that needs to be reset, repentance – as I’ve heard Ruth Haley Barton say – is a “death that needs to happen.”

Aug 14

Captivate by Interdependence

Posted on Thursday, August 14, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

heartsmanyYesterday was our 326-month wedding anniversary.
It’s also just a start.

Asking someone out is a start.
Dating is a shared-journey.
A wedding is a transitional celebration.
A marriage is an interdependent challenge.


I’m naturally introverted.
Therefore, community doesn’t come naturally.
Romance wasn’t in my born-with skill sets.
Interdependence seemed like weakness.

On the other hand, I wanted a long and happy marriage.

Interdependent Marriage