“Grace is God walking into your world with a sparkle in his eye and an offer that’s hard to resist. ‘Sit still for a bit. I can do wonders with this mess of yours.’ ” 1

Life and the challenges we face can leave us perplexed. This “mess” can bring distress. Rather than rush into action, or sit in sullen solitude God calls us to pray.

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” 2

This is how we know what real love is: Jesus gave his life for us. So we should give our lives for our brothers and sisters.

Suppose someone has enough to live and sees a brother or sister in need, but does not help. Then God’s love is not living in that person.

My children, we should love people not only with words and talk, but by our actions and true caring.

- 1 John 3:16-18, NCV

Monday How To Express Your Compassion began a series on compassion, followed by Silently Express Your Compassion.

I would argue that undermost circumstances when we express compassion we are better to be silent that to talk too much.

It’s important to listen patiently without an agenda.
And, to listen compassionately without judgment.

We all need to listen patiently, graciously and sensitively; seeking neither to give advice nor to fix people.

Sometimes we do need to speak up. It’s a challenge to know when to speak up and when to shut up.

Yesterday How To Express Your Compassion began a series on compassion borne out of pain.

Let me back up a step. For more than twenty years I have struggled to provide caring support for those in need.

You see, I’m a head-guy, more than a heart-guy.

As a cerebral-thinker it’s been a challenge to fit the deep emotional pain of people in pain within my worldview. It’s hard sometimes. Naturally I want to:
– Assess
– Fix
– Mind-map
– Problem-solve
– Trace things back to their origin

I want to manage, measure, navigate, unravel and diagnose.

People pass away every day.

Parents are in pain every day.

Teens deal with backstabbing and drama every day.

What can you do to help?
What’s been most effective?

Listen.
Listen. Listen. Listen.
Listen patiently without an agenda.
Listen compassionately without judgment.

My Two Requests

My good friend Nick is flying tomorrow to support a loved one whose son was killed by a drunk driver.

If you’re a praying person – especially if you’re a parent – please pray for the young man’s grieving family and friends.

Far too often when I feel that I am making progress my own propensity for old patterns and choices arises.

Not sure you know what I mean?

Have you had a Snickers instead of salad when you were hoping to eat more healthy?

Were you praying for patience and cursing out other drivers?

Were you still smarting from some ill-timed words when you assumed someone “gave you a look”? Only to find out they meant nothing by it!

Most of us are unwilling to be accountable. Too often we highlight the wrongs of others and dismiss or justify our own.

During our visit with Eric and Jill Lacher we marveled at their love.

Though they have similar hearts and values, they began their relationships with very different strategies for living out those values.

During our visit they shared with us that the wisdom of Emerson Eggerichs has helped them to grow deeper in love and express it more effectively to one another. On their behalf and to our benefit here’s some of what they learned.

How Does a Husband Spell Love to His Wife?

As I was approaching fifty years old I sought the wisdom of my elders. I sought out men and women older than I was to learn lessons on life that they had been learning.

Last Monday I began a series entitled A Treasure Chest Of Wisdom, including:

1. Don’t Hold Grudges
2. Take Care Of Your Health.
3. Compassion Makes Sense and Giving Is Better Than Taking
4. Greed Gains Momentum
5. Gratitude Leads To Contentment
6. Contentment Leads To Generosity

Everyone Splashes.  Splash Blessings.

In Curtis Eichelberger’s new book Men of Sunday he recounts coaches Tony Dungy, Marvin Lewis, and Brad Childress talking about the importance of having men of faith on their rosters.

“These players understand there is something bigger than themselves and realize that someday they’ll have to answer for their actions. The result is oftentimes a greater sense of humility, a willingness to think about the team over themselves, and the realization that their talent isn’t their due, but rather a gift from God to be used for His purpose.

Faith

If you’re like me, this has been a thought-provoking week.

The reader-response to this week’s mysilentscream.com had me thinking long and hard about the depth of our drama, the taste of our of trauma, and the deep pit in which some of our hidden pain resides.

Next week we’ll take a look at how to deal with our anger.

As this week concludes this ancient song — known as Psalm 51 — continues to echo through my mind as a prayer to God for help. 1

Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love.