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Jul 30

Frail

Posted on Wednesday, July 30, 2014 in Emotional, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

FrailBart Simpson wrote, “I will not torment the emotionally frail.”

Seth Gobin wrote, “All of us fail. Successful people fail often, and, [they] learn more from that failure than everyone else.”

What doesn’t help? “Getting good at avoiding blame and casting doubt.” To paraphrase Gobin, while it may seem like blame increase your chances for survival and happiness, in fact it merely prevents you from learning from worthwhile failures.

“I will not torment the emotionally frail (including myself)”

Sometimes we put the blame on ourselves. Over the years I’ve probably been hardest on myself when I failed, or when someone was hurt because of me.

Jun 27

I Worry And I Hate It

Posted on Friday, June 27, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Sports, TreeHouse, Values

Marcus_HudsonI don’t always realize how worry and anxiety affect me. In fact, if asked I would say that I don’t worry very often.

But then something happens, it happens most often in competitive settings.

I want to live a joy-filled life, but too often I have settled for wanting to be successful.

Success or Joy?

When have I chosen the pursuit of success over joy?

I complain when I think Halo or Call of Duty is being unfair to me.
I yell at myself – out loud – when I make a mistake playing tennis.
I become commanding when l am playing football. 1
I pout when my teammates make mistakes.

Jun 12

Push Through Your Fear

Posted on Thursday, June 12, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

think-1313532-mYesterday I would have screamed, “Don’t Act Like A Jerk!” if I wasn’t so aware of my tone of voice.

My tone of voice and the underlying thoughts and feelings have tripped me up more than I’d like to admit. Before I got around to admitting it, in this post, I asked: What should you be seeing in your own life? What do you let stand in the way of seeing it?

Hopefully you’ll think about that a while, but in the meantime with an honest assessment in hand, I’ll tell you how I’m dealing with my contribution to the turmoil I tend to create.

Jun 11

My Tone

Posted on Wednesday, June 11, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

sad face-110104_640What are you adding to your team? We all have something to add, but are we contributing and aware that we are?

We all have our quirks
. In a team setting, how do your quirks add value and how do they add drama?

Unfortunately, too often those quirks can make us look like jerks if we let them.

My “Tone”

Wow, do I hate those words. Not because someone doesn’t have a right to say them. Nor that they shouldn’t say them to me, but now, because they brought it up, I have to take an honest look at myself.

Apr 29

More April Fools

Posted on Tuesday, April 29, 2014 in Education, How To, Relational, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

flame3We all have blind spots in our life; misguided thinking, bad decisions and the like. Often times other people can see our blind spots but we either ignore, deny, or dismiss them.

On the other hand, sometimes we look at and assess others and assume what we see are their blind spots. Sometimes it’s us who can’t see clearly when we judge the lives.

Here are three people some would calls fools that I admire for their courage.

Three “Fools” I Admire

Apr 24

Pay Attention

Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2014 in Relational, Values

toiletpaperThis is one of those times maybe I should have checked with someone else before I hit the “Publish” button, but frankly I think it fits my theme so comment your complaints if you need to.

This week we’re discussing Blind Spots. We all have them. Misguided thinking, bad decisions and the like. Often times other people can see our blind spots but we either ignore, deny, or dismiss them.

In the Blind Spots sub-category of “Preventable things I wish didn’t happen to me” I offer the following. I neither assume the following to be factual nor fictional; either way they serve as a warning to those of us who don’t always “pay attention.”

Apr 23

Hypocrisy

Posted on Wednesday, April 23, 2014 in Relational, Values

Cat - Beware of dogMost people have blind spots. I do. You do.

This week on mysilentscream.com we’re looking at a few common blind spots.

The classic blind spot is the justification, “Do as I say, not as I do.” The person or persons believe that the rules should apply to other people.

That must be how, as one woman pointed out, “There are countries that enforce strict ‘puritanical’ laws – no drinking, no parties, no intermingling males and females etc. Yet, members of the ruling class have their lavish parties, lots of alcohol and women etc etc. Is that hypocritical?” 1

Apr 22

Blind Spots

Posted on Tuesday, April 22, 2014 in Relational

Blindspot_three_cars_illus“BEEEEEP!” screamed someone’s car horn.
“Was that directed at me?” I asked myself.
It happened again last week.
I had done nothing wrong.
I hate when someone honks their horn at me rudely.

On the other hand, sometimes I’m in the wrong.

More than once, despite my best intentions I try to drive my car into an open traffic lane only to have someone wisely interrupt me with a well-deserved warning, “BEEEEEP!”

I was the rude one. I did not properly consider the possibility of a blind spot.

Blind Spots

Oct 2

Honestly Corrupted

Posted on Wednesday, October 2, 2013 in Emotional, Relational, Values

Corruption Challenged

Why do people feel compelled to tell their friends that they like their ugly shirt? That “their hair is so cute”? That they enjoy a song that they’ve never heard? Or, watched a movie they’ve never seen?

Why?

I believe that it’s all boils down to a fear of rejection. Too often we are held in bondage by fear; that if we are honest that people will reject us.

I have found that people like and trust me more since I chose to always be honest than when I tried to say what I thought that they wanted me to say.

Aug 20

Comic Book Failure

Posted on Tuesday, August 20, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

Justice League106Yesterday I explained that I began reading comic books when I was ten years old. Then for more than twenty years I didn’t read a single issue.

So when I resumed reading comic books initially it was to both revisit some special childhood memories and then to complete some stories with unresolved cliffhangers.

Little did I know that as I read I’d find meaningful lessons. For example, the comic book depicted here.

We’re Not Alone

Justice League was a team-based comic book series that faced only the biggest most challenging challenges. Their membership combined some of the greatest heroes in the DC Comic universe.