What do you do when you have one agenda, and someone else has another, but you’re supposed to be “on the same page”?

Your parent may be right.
Your parent may be wrong.
Your teen may be realistic.
Your teen may be deluded.

One principle helps me make sense of other people — even very smart people — who make stupid choices.

The principle: Most people do what they believe makes sense.

This weekend teens  will:
– Lie to their parents about where they are going
– Lie to their parents about what they will be doing
– Lie to their parents about where they will spend the night
– Lie to their parents about who they will be with

Wait, Why Am I Talking?

As I wrote yesterday the acronym W.A.I.T. is a great reminder — as they say — it’s right on the button.

It’s a big red pause button to stop my panic and prevent me from causing additional pain to myself or others.

I’m talking. Am I trying to coach and counsel? Or, am I trying to control?

Wait, Why Am I Talking?

I think Wait, Why Am I Talking? is a wonderful self-check as I pray as well.

Sometimes people — myself included — complicate life needlessly.

Yesterday my friend Steve Wiens reminded me of an Anne Lamott’s acronym W.A.I.T.  I’ll explain what it means in a moment, but you’ll — pardon the pun — have to wait.

Wait

Lamott’s most recent book “Some Assembly Required: A Journal of My Son’s First Son” describes the challenge she faced, especially in the beginning, as she tried to find a balance between helping and hampering her teenage son who was suddenly faced with an unplanned pregnancy.

Today begins a three-part series on chains that lock us down. 

By that I mean that:

They shackle us to selfishness
They clamp our compassion
They fasten our desire to offer forgiveness
They latch us to loneliness
They padlock our potential

Today’s two chains poison us:

Gotta Be My Way – If we spend all our time demanding that others think and sound like we do we’ll never really learn, much less embrace, what they think.

Drama Dragger – Trying to drag others into our emotional slop so they will make us feel better never works for long.