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Jul 16

Predictable

Posted on Wednesday, July 16, 2014 in Emotional, Relational, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

Note: This is part 3 of the series, By The Numbers. Catch up if you need to:
1. Paint By Numbers.
2. By The Numbers.

photoIt’s 2:38 A.M.

Few people who know me well would be surprised that I’m awake. Almost everyone would be surprised that it’s 2:38 A.M. and I just woke up.

Huh?

I’m a night owl, but last night I had to go to bed early for a 4:15 A.M. wake up.

Predictably I didn’t need an alarm. Predictably, I didn’t want to startle Amy awake at 4:15 A.M. Predictably, I woke up early enough not to need an alarm.

Jun 12

Push Through Your Fear

Posted on Thursday, June 12, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

think-1313532-mYesterday I would have screamed, “Don’t Act Like A Jerk!” if I wasn’t so aware of my tone of voice.

My tone of voice and the underlying thoughts and feelings have tripped me up more than I’d like to admit. Before I got around to admitting it, in this post, I asked: What should you be seeing in your own life? What do you let stand in the way of seeing it?

Hopefully you’ll think about that a while, but in the meantime with an honest assessment in hand, I’ll tell you how I’m dealing with my contribution to the turmoil I tend to create.

Jun 11

My Tone

Posted on Wednesday, June 11, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

sad face-110104_640What are you adding to your team? We all have something to add, but are we contributing and aware that we are?

We all have our quirks
. In a team setting, how do your quirks add value and how do they add drama?

Unfortunately, too often those quirks can make us look like jerks if we let them.

My “Tone”

Wow, do I hate those words. Not because someone doesn’t have a right to say them. Nor that they shouldn’t say them to me, but now, because they brought it up, I have to take an honest look at myself.

Jun 10

Team Tensions

Posted on Tuesday, June 10, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Values

photo(3b)Sunday our Spring Cleaning Team tackled our home. Amy is detail-oriented. Josh is an innovative thinker and a hard worker. Shannon is a team player with a great attitude. I work long and hard.

That all sounds like a great productive team, but it takes some work to cope with each person’s unique style.

Team Tensions

Apr 1

NOT AN April Fool Story!

Posted on Tuesday, April 1, 2014 in Emotional, Relational, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

800px-Thamnophis_sirtalis_(Common_Garter_Snake)_I told this story a couple years ago, but I’d like to tell it again. If you get one of the eyewitnesses to tell it it’s even better told in person. That said, this is NOT an April Fools story!

For almost thirty years TreeHouse trips have been wonderful times to great fun and building relationships. We listen and talk. We challenge our thinking, and inspire one another to new ways of living.

On one autumn trip we also saw the inexplicable.

Jan 7

19 Proven Relationship Tips from Lizzy & Bueno

Posted on Tuesday, January 7, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

Lizzy and Bueno 20140107_15pI’ve spent more than twenty years “Inspiring Great Relationships Every Day.” I enjoy when I can pass on something I am learning, but many times in those conversations it was me who was the learner.

Today was no different.

Today I sat down with my friends Lizzy and Bueno. We laughed. We told stories. We love gardening so we exchanged seeds. And we talked.

In a world desperate for positive role models, over the past three years Lizzy and Bueno have been role models of what a healthy relationship looks like.

Jan 6

3 Cures For The Chills

Posted on Monday, January 6, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

1-Window

 

If you think this winter is cold, you’re right.

But, be glad you’re not in Antarctica.

NationalGeographic.com reported that on August 10, 2010 scientists “measured the most frigid temperature ever recorded … about -136°F (-93°C) — colder than dry ice.”

Chilly Relationships

Spend any time in a mall and you’ll see freezing temperatures, indoors.

You’ll see frustrated and impatient men. You’ll see angry and frustrated women. People who’d say they love one another, but kindle coldness. The heat of their romance has formed a chill.

Dec 31

5 Relationship Tips from Big Bang Theory

Posted on Tuesday, December 31, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Values

BBTThis Christmas my wife bought me (by my request) season 6 of CBS’s The Big Bang Theory television show.

1. Be patient. 1

Bernadette: So, you actually see you and Sheldon getting married someday?
Amy: Not just someday. In exactly four years. But don’t tell Sheldon. He’s still a flight risk.

Patient fishing catches fish. Impatient pursuit scares away many potential catches.

2. Don’t be pushy. 2

Jun 26

Enemies of Empathy

Posted on Wednesday, June 26, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

1064361_golf_ball “Fore!”

Golfers yell “fore” when he or she hits a shot that might strike another golfer on the course. In fact, it is every golfer’s responsibility to watch carefully after hitting a shot to make sure another golfer is not in danger.

“Fore!”

Unfortunately, I’ve had to shout “Fore!” more than once.
Sometimes it’s just a warning.
Other times it’s imminent danger.

To me and you: “Fore!” “My friends, watch out!” 1

Watch Out?

I’ve spent the last year thinking through myself. I am trying to notice, to watch:
– What am I doing?
– Why am I doing it?
– Who’s watching?
– Am I living and acting like someone I would admire?

Jun 25

Learn Empathy

Posted on Tuesday, June 25, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

praying66955_640

 

People Challenges

My first year at TreeHouse was challenging. During that first year I quickly realized that despite an excellent education, wise mentors and patient supervision that I was unprepared.
– Unprepared for the pain I would see
– Unprepared for the emotions people would express
– Unprepared for the evil “loved ones” would perpetrate
– Unprepared for the diverse values, motives and philosophies of life

People, caring about people, is challenging.

Learn Empathy

Every emotionally healthy person can learn empathy. We can all develop what google.com called our “ability to understand and share the feelings of another.” 1