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Mar 6

Listening is NOT a waste of time!

Posted on Thursday, March 6, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

listen file9991303336088Last night I sat with a group of men, young and old; a forty-year spread among them. Teens, college students and, as I like to call them, “grownups” sat together.

I told them the story of “my crossroad.” I then asked them, “When was a time when things didn’t work out the way wanted them to?”

After a moment, one brave guy replied, “When I went to college. It was much different than high school. All my friends were gone.” Another guy listened, and added, “My first day as a teacher I almost threw up. Literally I almost threw up. I was so anxious.”

Mar 5

Listen Before Speaking

Posted on Wednesday, March 5, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

Sucking toads“Sometimes I just wanna choke somebody,” he said.

Exasperated with his friend, he was beside himself. “Why does he do such stupid things?” he asked no one. “What’s he thinking?” he continued.

I imagine the friends of this young man may have thought the same thing.

Somethings just don’t seem to make sense but all we wanna hear is something that does make sense. Unfortunately, too often we’re not really listening.

Listening Before Speaking

Mar 4

Listen For Their Cries

Posted on Tuesday, March 4, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

alone-61043_640Yesterday I introduced you to the woman who cried alone.

She wept alone.
She didn’t choose to be alone.
She simply was alone.

The grocery store was full of alone people. Most did not choose to be alone. Some did.

Some were not alone; they were with family, friends, co-workers and colleagues.
They were with people in person.
And “with” people on their phones.

But that woman cried alone.
Until people stopped being alone.
And they started being together.

Together, No Longer Alone

Jan 14

Deep Desire

Posted on Tuesday, January 14, 2014 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

prayer file5131258260195“Desire is not merely a simple wish; it is a deep seated craving; an intense longing … it’s so important that one might say, almost, that desire is an absolute essential of prayer.” 1

Desire precedes prayer, accompanies it, and is followed by it. Desire goes before prayer, and by it, it’s created and intensified.

Prayer is the expression of desire.

Prayer comes out into the open.
Desire is silent.
Prayer is heard; desire, unheard.

Prayer – listening to, learning from and expressing our longings to God – is throughout the Scriptures.

Jan 2

Mouths Speak, Eyes Talk

Posted on Thursday, January 2, 2014 in Relational, Social, Values

eye-close-up-1386149-mI worked with Cheryl, and Wes is a close friend to our family, but I’d only met Amber (Cheryl’s daughter) a couple times.

When Amber first spoke to me about her relationship with Paul and invited me to officiate their wedding I had a blend of feelings. The list was long and enmeshed, but my feelings could best be summarized with these three questions:
Do they know what “love” is?
– Do they share the same definition?
– Do they love one another with that love?

Dec 31

5 Relationship Tips from Big Bang Theory

Posted on Tuesday, December 31, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Values

BBTThis Christmas my wife bought me (by my request) season 6 of CBS’s The Big Bang Theory television show.

1. Be patient. 1

Bernadette: So, you actually see you and Sheldon getting married someday?
Amy: Not just someday. In exactly four years. But don’t tell Sheldon. He’s still a flight risk.

Patient fishing catches fish. Impatient pursuit scares away many potential catches.

2. Don’t be pushy. 2

Dec 30

28 on 30

Posted on Monday, December 30, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social

7648_nThanks to Lance and Rachel, this weekend I had the privilege of officiating my 28th wedding. It’s not something I pursue – and I often turn down opportunities to officiate weddings – but getting to know couples on a deeper level and investing in their marriage is an incredible privilege.

As mysilentscream.com closes out 2013 and we head into 2014 I am excited to share helpful help that I have learned from incredible couples.

Whether you’re single or dating, married or harried, divorced or dilemma-filled, widowed or winsome in your disdain for commitment, I believe that you’ll find something of value.

Nov 27

Secrets of Dynamic Communication by Ken Davis

Posted on Wednesday, November 27, 2013 in Education, How To, Reviews

Secrets of Dynamic CommunicationMichael Hyatt explains in the Introduction, “Whether you are a professional speaker, pastor, corporate executive, author—or are just passionate about a message—you can take your communication skills to the next level. Ken’s SCORRE system truly revolutionized my public presentations. The good news? What I learned from him sits right here, in this book. Within these pages, you’ll learn how to:
• dramatically reduce your prep time,
• communicate with more clarity and focus,
• increase your ability to connect with the audience, and
• craft speeches that leave an impact.”

Oct 30

Listen Beneath The Surface

Posted on Wednesday, October 30, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

rememberingsA while back I wrote the very popular 9 Consequences Of Not Listening.

This week I’d like to highlight five listening moments.

Monday was Listening to Understand
Tuesday was Listen Deeply

Listen In

One of the treasures in my life is how much other people trust me. The joys, the sorrows, the missteps and the secrets that people share with me are among my most precious treasures.

Sometimes we wander onto a treasure like a random twenty dollar bill on the ground. Sometimes we find a treasure by randomly watching a movie on Netflix. Sometimes we have to dig deep for a treasure like hard gardening work in the Spring months before a Fall harvest.

Oct 29

Listen Deeply

Posted on Tuesday, October 29, 2013 in How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

longing_2A year and a half ago I wrote the very popular 9 Consequences Of Not Listening.

This week I’d like to highlight five listening moments.

Monday was Listening to Understand

Listen In

Listening, really listening, makes a huge difference in our relationships.
– We hear more of what’s being said
– We quiet our need to be in control
– The speaker feels more lovable as we pay attention
– We assure the speaker feels worthwhile as we listen
– Our self-respect grows as we commend ourselves as capable listeners