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Aug 28

Church Chat

Posted on Thursday, August 28, 2014 in Emotional, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

church_yard_2I know a lot of people disappointed with “the church.”

I don’t know of a perfect church out there; ours included.

There is always a point – or sermon – I disagree with, music that I don’t like, people that I don’t know, looks that feel judging, practices that confuse me, etc., etc.

They probably feel the same way about me! And you.

Church Clutter

I’ve attended many churches of several denominations. In fact, I was in a church today with some things I fully agreed with and some teachings that … uhm, no!

Jan 9

Our Dream for TreeHouse Support Groups

Posted on Wednesday, January 9, 2013 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, TreeHouse, Values

While it’s true that love can happen anywhere, there are standards and expectations that provide an environment in which a healthy community grows.

As I wrote yesterday, “every week as I sit in our TreeHouse support groups I am in awe. Teens find hope amid their hurt, faith amid their fears, and love despite their pangs of loneliness…I wish everyone had a community like that.”

I Wish We Did Too

As my friend Hudson pointed out tonight, the following list is a wish list — Imagine If… — based on hopes and dreams. While some of them are possible, and others are measurable, there are on the list that are almost fantasies; but, still we reach and stretch for more.

Nov 25

What Matters Most by Leonard Sweet

Posted on Sunday, November 25, 2012 in Relational, Reviews, Social, Spiritual, Values

“What Matters Most: How We Got the Point but Missed the Person” is a reprint of a 2004 book, entitled “Out of the Question…Into the Mystery.”

That said, this is a powerful book that needed to be re-considered for an audience, myself included, that missed it when it was first released.

“Belief can exist in isolation, but faith requires a relationship.” For without dynamic, engaging deep relationships — relationship with Jesus and then relationship with people — we cannot demonstrate love.

Aug 10

Granddads & Grace

Posted on Friday, August 10, 2012 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

I drove to see my parents this week.  While visiting them I attended a bible study that my father attends.  Among the participants were four retired pastors and several other grandfatherly men. 

Five things were clear as I spent the morning reading, listening, talking and eating with these men:

- They are men with the same feelings as the young men I’ve worked with, just different life experiences.

- They felt safe and were willing to share their knowledge, wisdom, pains and sorrows. 

- You would never know who the three pastors were.  There was not one trace of “I know more than you do.”

Apr 3

Trampled-On Tuesday

Posted on Tuesday, April 3, 2012 in Emotional, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

I’ve been confronted by several people that I respect recently. Whether I want it to or not, confrontation can tear at, or even trample, my self-identity.

One person suggested that I sounded like I thought that I knew more than other people and “if only they knew what I knew then they would be okay.”  I hate when I’ve been condescending. 

I’ve also been confronted that I seem intimidated around people who are wealthier than me; and they are right.

Self-Doubt Sunday

Jan 21

Why Men Hate Going To Church by David Murrow

Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2012 in Education, Emotional, How To, Relational, Reviews, Social, Spiritual, Values

I’m a man.  Of the clan “men.”  I love going to church.

That said, Murrow’s title was compelling.  Here’s what I learned.

Here are his chapter titles and my brief summaries:

PART 1: WHERE ARE THE MEN?

1. Perfectly Designed – The church needs a re-design to open doors to men.
2. Yes, There Really Is a Gender Gap – And, it’s increasing worldwide
3. Men: Who Needs ’Em? – We do they bring balance, energy and drive
4. Who Are the Missing Men? – They’re getting “results” somewhere.
5. The Masculinity Bank – A typical man won’t do something he believes is feminine.
6. The Two Jesuses – We’re taught God’s meekness we no longer fear his wrath.

Oct 12

Shame Solution – Healthy Role Models

Posted on Wednesday, October 12, 2011 in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values

Healthy role models break the cycle of shame. 

They emotionally and spiritually empower healthy communities.

How can you recognize a safe, healthy church, synagogue, workplace or family?

Here are ten attributes of healthy communities:

Feel empathy
Exude warmth
Demonstrate genuineness
Are emotionally stable
Are caring & supportive
Promote and practice honesty
Have appropriate expectations
Maintain respectful boundaries
Persevere through inevitable relationship challenges
And, love one another