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Oct 28

Listening to Understand

Posted on Monday, October 28, 2013 in Uncategorized

scream-37172-mA year and a half ago I wrote the very popular 9 Consequences Of Not Listening.

This week I’d like to highlight five listening moments.

Listen In

“I can’t stand it!”, she said. An exasperated parent continued, “Don’t you hate it when you are in a nice restaurant and enjoying your meal and suddenly a screaming kid ruins it?” Without waiting for an answer, she continued, “I can’t stand when my mood and my meal is ruined someone’s screaming children.” As her angry exposition continued her face contorted, “This time it was MY son!”

Oct 17

Honest But Hurtful

Posted on Thursday, October 17, 2013 in Uncategorized

freeimage-2675170-webJustified By Anger

“You gotta be yourself…”
“I was like…”
“But then that b**** said…”

“She talks too much!
“I woulda told that hoe…”
“But that stupid b**** said…”

“Hey, I’m just being REAL…”
“I’ve gotta be able to say how I feel. I don’t care, I’m stand up.”

I know you’ve heard it.
Have you thought it?
Maybe you said it.

Justified By Self-Pity

Can’t relate to any of those? How about the awkward moment when you realize you’re wrong in an argument, but you keep arguing anyway. Or your daydreaming your way through those perfect conversations where finally everyone agrees the other person was at fault.

Sep 11

We ARE Loved

Posted on Wednesday, September 11, 2013 in Uncategorized

Some people always seem to have a song running through their minds, I almost never do. This morning I woke up to this playing in my mind

He Loves Us

It’s such good news for me.

Mysilentscream had been silent for a while for two reasons:
– I’d been very busy
– I’d been very sad and angry (I’ll tell you more another day)
But, God has been cracking through the crust of my crap.
I’m blessed and grateful for it.

The words keep echoing in my mind:

Jun 18


Posted on Tuesday, June 18, 2013 in Uncategorized

0imagesDonald Miller’s post yesterday entitled, “Learning to Turn the Other Cheek (Even Though I HATE Critics)” got me thinking, “How would I respond to attacks?” I assumed I would respond defensively and with self-pity.


Blessed are the peacemakers…Blessed are those who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness.“1

Last night as I read Philip Yancey’s book The Jesus I Never Knew about those verses this account challenged my thinking.

Jun 5

Address It

Posted on Wednesday, June 5, 2013 in Uncategorized

a_studying_for_a_test_1Today some friends and I will be addressing, printing, folding, stuffing, sealing and stamping letters and envelopes. As much as we might want the letter to arrive if one of those steps gets missed the letters will not likely reach their destination.

Of course we could be sincere, earnest, dependable and determined. but…
… if the address is wrong it won’t reach the intended readers
… if the print is illegible the readers can’t read it
… if the folds are in the wrong places the letters won’t fit
… if the letters are stuffed in a haphazard way they won’t seal
… if the “seal” on the envelope doesn’t seal the letter may fall out
… if the stamp is not affixed the letter will not be delivered

May 17

Is Grace Happening To You?

Posted on Friday, May 17, 2013 in Uncategorized

jesus_in_the_gardenIs grace happening to you?
Is grace happening in you?
Is grace happening through you?

I’ve been stuck emotionally and spiritually more than I’d like to admit. Raise your hand if you can relate? Okay, we’re all “not alone.” But, let’s not stay stuck!

Looking to take a step forward in your life?

Want your actions to more closely match your intentions?

Me too!

Each of the themes below links to a previous mysilentscream post that has been helpful to readers looking to make a change. 1

Love – Tired of empty expressions of “love”?

May 16

Grace Transforms

Posted on Thursday, May 16, 2013 in Uncategorized

Ruins_mill_city_museumGod transforms. God heals. God restores. God does so in my life and can do so in yours.

Max Lucado wrote, let grace, let God, “so seep into the crusty cracks of your life that everything softens. Then let it, let him, bubble to the surface, like a spring in the Sahara, in words of kindness and deeds of generosity.”

God will change you, my friend.

Jesus’ death is the means to new life for others…suffering is an avenue for God’s life to transform situations.” 1

May 15

When Grace Happens In Me

Posted on Wednesday, May 15, 2013 in Uncategorized

pointing_handI meet many people in my work. The vast majority of the people I meet are generally normal people. Children are children. Teens are teens. Adults are adults.

I live in a community in which the high school is populated by about seventy-percent “people of color.” Generally speaking I like people different than me.

Across from me is the other kind of person.
I have really tried to like that person, but woah!


I’ve known her family for about twenty years. I’ve been in their house. I’ve pet their dog, talked to their cat, spent time with her parents, and gotten to know her siblings. I have tried to like her, but woah.

Mar 26


Posted on Tuesday, March 26, 2013 in Uncategorized

arapahoe basin (a-basin)Years ago some friends and I rented snowshoes and drove into A-Basin (Arapahoe Basin) in Colorado. When we arrived we strapped on our snowshoes.

Though we were all about the same size with the same size snowshoe, no one seemed to have any trouble, except me. For some reason I kept dropping through the snow-pack. I kept getting stuck.

The worst was when I had one leg plunged deep into the snow all the way to my groin and the other flat on the surface. While trying to extricate my left leg my right leg plunged through the snow nearly reaching the depth of the other. I howled something impolite as I realized that I was now going to dig myself out of the snow while wearing my snowshoes.

Jan 11

We Need Perspective

Posted on Friday, January 11, 2013 in Uncategorized

We need wisdom.
We need clarity.

We need accountability.
We need to stop pretending.

We need to admit we need others.
We need someone to be honest with us.

We need to pull our head out of…
We need to shut down the machine we use to crank out “I can handle this alone.”

We Need Perspective

Usually when we’re worried or upset
that we start trying to force it, to fake it, to “make it happen,”
then things start falling apart;
it’s because we’ve lost perspective.