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Oct 21

Questions That Help Make Your Heart Grow Stronger

Posted on Friday, October 21, 2011 in Uncategorized

Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi has been defeated.  MSNBC reported that his last words were: ‘Do you know right from wrong?’ I do not know whether he was treated as he should have been or not. I know that he deserved justice,  just like you and I do.

I don’t interact with world leaders, but in my sphere of influence I have to ask myself: ‘Do you know right from wrong?

I want to treat people, especially my loved ones, with the ultimate respect.  I try, but sometimes I get in my own way.

Yesterday I wrote, “Guard your heart. Don’t let your anger or hurts overtake you. Guard one another from being surrounded by resentment, sunk by anger, or swallowed by bitterness.”

Q – Why is that so hard?
A – It takes hard work to consistently choose to act kindly and caring.
Q – What’s one thing that I can do to make a real difference?
A – Figure out why and how you add to conflicts.

But, I must warn you that I have more questions than answers for you and for me, but here are some important ones.

Is vulnerability a challenge?
What feeling do you have the most difficulty controlling?
What feeling do you have the most difficulty expressing?

What fears get in the way?
Do you affirm healthy boundaries?
How can you guard yourself from distrorted or unhealthy self-protection?

Is conflict disabling?
How do you feel when someone close to you disagrees with you?
What is your typical reaction when someone criticizes you?

Is compromise calming or corrupting?
Do you find it difficult to compromise on things?
Do you enable others in order to “keep the peace” at the expense of your integrity?

Is anger empowering, disempowering or a natural part of normal relationships?
Do you enjoy debating others?
What things tend to make you angry?
How do you usually react when you are angry?

Love is an easy word to say, but how can you love one another through the tough times?

How can you have a great friendship, relationship or marriage? 1
Don’t just pretend to love. Really love.
Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly; hold tightly, to what is good.
Love each other with genuine affection – don’t fight with each other, fight for each other.

Where will that strength come from?

God says, “Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.” 2

Let me add again, “healthy relationships are ones in which we protect one another, even from themselves.”

Want to have a great friendship, romance, or marriage? Great relationships are great treasures that take a great deal of work.

Preview – More about having hard conversations next week.

1 & 2 – Romans 12:9-18

Bring on the comments

  1. Thanks Scott

  2. Angi, may your big heart grow even more huge!

  3. Thanks my friend.. I cherish the fact I get to call you friend.

  4. I agree Tom, I value our friendship too.
    I also appreciate your leadership.
    I, well, envy your fantasy football shrewdness.
    I laughed to myself, “envy” was much easier to type than “hate” with an envious tone. =D

  5. […] When Amber first spoke to me about her relationship with Paul and invited me to officiate their wedding I had a blend of feelings. The list was long and enmeshed, but my feelings could best be summarized with these three questions: – Do they know what “love” is? – Do they share the same definition? – Do they love one another with that love? […]

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