Posted on Wednesday, August 8, 2012
in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values
Yesterday in Pumpkin-Seed & Peeps I mentioned that embattled people can still be gracious.
We can choose to respect people we don’t like.
– We can choose to tolerate your differences.
– We can choose to talk things out rather than stuff your annoyances.
We can choose to bring happiness.
– If we hug people, let’s offer everyone hugs.
– We can all choose to forget the drama.
– We can all choose to forgive the guilty.
That final point, “choose to forgive the guilty” is a sticking point for many.
Some people “forgive” and resent.
Some people “forgive” and keep score.
Some people “forgive” and deny their feelings.
Some people “forgive” and stuff their thoughts.
Some people “forgive” and stay angry.
Some people “forgive” and redirect their feelings onto others.
Some people “forgive” and poison others with their bitterness.
I’m challenged by Ken Sande’s perspective. 1
These four promises give me the power to not lose the battle to false forgiveness.
Four Promises Of Forgiveness
1. “I will no longer dwell on this incident.”
2. “I will not bring up this incident again and use it against you.”
3. “I will not talk to others about this incident.”
4. “I will not allow this incident to stand between us or hinder our relationship.”
Those four promises will help me to truly forgive others.
Maybe they would even help me to truly forgive myself.
“That’s a good idea!”, and this is mysilentscream.
1 – From Ken Sande’s book The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict