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Jun 23

Don’t Settle, Get Support

Posted on Saturday, June 23, 2012 in Uncategorized

“Whoever does not have a good father should procure one.”
Friedrich Nietzsche

I love that quote.
– Do you wish that you had a trustworthy father figure? Find one.
– Do you wish that you had an affirming father figure? Find one.
– Do you wish that you had a playful father figure? Find one.
– Do you wish that you had a wise father figure? Find one.

If I was looking for a father figure I would look in a good church. Honest.  Regardless what you’ve heard, there are many good people in good churches who are making a positive difference in the world. 

My church has many men that I admire.
They are not perfect men, but they are men that I admire:

– Brian is trustworthy.
– Tom is affirming.
– Nick is playful.
– Eric is wise.

How do I know? While I am older than three of the four, they all bless me like good fathers do.

Excursus – In good churches there is also a welcome mat for imperfect people like you and me.

Yes, in good churches there are:
– Caring families
– Men who don’t cheat
– Women who don’t gossip
– There are older men who dream about mentoring men who need wisdom
– There are older women who long to pass on their insights and experiences

If you discover your wound, I would urge you get some help; some caring support.
– Some of you may need the wise counsel of a friend
– Some of you may need a life-coach to give you direction.
– Some of you may need a spiritual director to help you connect with God.
– Some of you may need therapist to help you sort out fact from fiction.
– Some of you may need treatment to deal with the deep darkness within.

Caution: “The problem of father hunger does not lend itself to a miracle cure…be prepared for a long process…the distorted thoughts and behaviors stemming from father hunger are deeply embedded.” 1

Therapists in the Twin Cities that can help with the “deeply embedded” include:

Connected Families, 952-448-3625

Family Innovations, 952-224-2282

Link Therapy & Mediation, 763-250-5633

Pathways Psychological Services, 763-525-8590


1 – From Father Hunger by Robert S. McGee

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