Amy and I saw incredible beauty and riches in Hawaii, and we saw signs of tragedy and injustice.

Challenges

“How many steps does it take to become homeless? It depends.

Remember the owl in the old tootsie pop commercial? He would ask how many licks to get to the center of the pop; take a few and then chomp down on it. Task accomplished.

So needless to say it doesn’t take all that much to hit the streets for survival.

Some of the steps are subtle and unnoticed for some time. While others have a certain finality to them: Now you know you’re in trouble and your options just shriveled up.

In (the case of Joe Bright) there were two major steps: closing a business through bankruptcy, and the end of a long-term relationship. Those alone are usually big disruptors in anyone’s life though they don’t usually tip the scale that far. So how did it really happen? Several smaller steps — or licks of the lollipop if you will.” 1

Crosses

Every surfer sight had crosses to commemorate the life of someone — surfer and swimmers –  who had lost their life just having fun.

Communities

A mile or so away from the beauty of these shorelines on Oahu’s West shore is this community pictured on the right.

Confluence

I feel tension when I see the world and it’s dysfunction.  I feel the tension of that those who can do should be able to enjoy it, and those who cannot should have the opportunity to enjoy it too.

While I cannot embrace all the notions in John Mayer’s song “Waiting On The World To Change” I understand the frustration:

Now we see everything that’s going wrong
With the world and those who lead it
We just feel like we don’t have the means
To rise above and beat it
So we keep waiting (Waiting)
Waiting on the world to change
We keep on waiting (Waiting)
Waiting on the world to change
It’s hard to beat the system
When we’re standing at a distance
So we keep waiting (Waiting)
Waiting on the world to change

I prayed for those in the homeless community, but I didn’t stop to chat and get to know their stories.

I want change, but I don’t always know what to do.

(Dis) Content

In the meantime I’m praying for wisdom to know what to do when I vote, when I meet those in need and when I see someone with money who wants to bless others who need help.

I’m not content with just waiting. Sometimes I can and will act. Other times, in the big picture, I know I’ll have to wait I must until God rights all the wrongs.

Let’s join together to honor our Creator.  “As the Scriptures say, “They share freely and give generously to the poor. Their good deeds will be remembered forever.” 2

May it be so.  This is mysilentscream.

1 -Read this as more of Joe Bright’s story here

2 – 2 Corinthians 9:9, NLT

Fortunately, we fought those fears back down.

The food from the shrimp trucks were my favorite meals I had on our vacation and among the most reasonably priced meals we ate.

Our two favorite shrimp truck meals were on Oahu.

We ate at Giovanni’s shrimp truck on Oahu’s North Shore.  On the main street in the surf-town of Halei’wa we found a couple of shrimp trucks parked in the shade.  We had read enough reviews of restaurants including shrimp truck reviews to know that Giovanni’s would be safe and delicious, and they were. 

Additionally, they invite their customers to sign their truck.  Since our Hawaiian trip was our 25th wedding anniversary trip I looked for a prominent place to add our mark.  Having cleared it with the owners I climbed into the hood of the truck and there centered right above the windshield is our mark commemorating our anniversary.

Less sentimental but more palatable was our stop at Fumi’s Shrimp Farm shrimp truck.  There we had the best tasting shrimp I have ever had ever, ever, ever, had.

The shrimp were properly prepared and seasoned, but undoubtedly they tasted so wonderful in part because they were raised within a hundred yards of the skillet.

To make it more special for Amy and I both truck had cooks willing to prepare Amy’s shrimp with vegetable oil instead of butter to accommodate her lactose intolerance.

1 – NDDIC and Discovery Communications’ How Stuff Works explain that harmful bacteria are the most common cause of foodborne illnesses.

One day Amy asked, “Don’t you want any souvenirs?”  Then, before I could answer Amy answered her own question, “Oh, yeah, food is your souvenir!”  Unfortunately, based on the size of my waistline, I may have those souvenirs for a while.

Truth be told, I did come home with souvenirs.  I brought home five different blends of different Hawaiian coffees from three different plantations.

On Oahu we tasted our favorite coffee was the Dole Plantation’s Waialua Coffee.

I hated the “tourist-trap” feel of the Dole Plantation — and how expensive items in their gift shop were — so all I did was buy a couple reasonably priced cups of brewed coffee.

On Maui we visited a plantation that we “could have” bought a 2.5 acre lot on which we could build a home and have enough land for a profitable coffee harvest.  The lots started at $585,000.

When we reached the island of Kauai we visited the Kauai Coffee Company plantation.

I loved that they had many of their brews available to freely sample.

I also loved that they offered a coffee of the month club.  Hopefully, that membership will last longer than the seafood I’m storing underneath my new Kauai Coffee Company t-shirt.  =D

As many of you know a very kind and generous man gave us his frequent flier miles so our airfare to and from Hawaii was free.  Thus began our scramble to do our part to make the rest of the dream a reality.

The ridiculous list of never-done-befores is extensive, but it begins with saving a large amount of money for fun while maintaining our generally charitable mindset and our eyes on God to see the needs of our neighborhood and the world.

In hindsight, I am only aware of one single time I was really, really torn as to whether or not to give away a large amount of money to a need we became aware of, but someone else met it, so my heart was relieved.  We continued saving.

One of the first Bible verses I ever memorized was Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart.  Lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge him (God), and he will make your paths straight.“

God guided us to good deals, helpful people with wise advice and special opportunities. 

This picture of Amy is how we spent lots of time.  Amy looked for whales and I enjoyed watching Amy look for whales. 

More tomorrow.

If you’re a typical husband:
– you’re not eager to be vulnerable
– you don’t want to be corrected or enjoy opportunities to challenge your behavior
– you don’t want to schedule weekly interrogation sessions
Those concerns are addressed in the book. 

This book is meant to build you up, not to break you down.

The devotions are easy to follow and quite short — 800-900 words each — three or four minutes of reading.

Some readers will appreciate the brevity of each weekly devotional. Others will want more to reflect on. For those readers, Eggerichs provides 3-5 additional questions that “can be used for individual study, discussion groups, or sparking conversations between husband and wife” in the appendix.

I found Eggerichs’ book beneficial and worth my time, and I believe it will be worth your time too; even though the information varies in quality from insightful to clichéd to uninspired as the following four samples illustrate.

Chapter 1: And They Lived Happily Ever After . . . Not Necessarily
INSIGHT: In marriage, it is never about not falling. It is always about getting back up.

Chapter 20: Sex and Affection: A Two-Way Street
“Sex and affection are the best proving grounds to help you and your spouse grow in love and respect for each other physically, emotionally, and intimately. Look at the sexual aspect of your relationship as a compliment to how important you are in your spouse’s life. You are the only person who can meet this need in your spouse!”

Chapter 40: If Only We Didn’t Have Money Problems
INSIGHT: The Lord will provide for all our needs; we may have to wait for our wants.

Chapter 48: Do You Know How to Fight Fair?
ACTION: The next time you disagree, argue, or fight, stop and think: Am I being fair? Friendly? Civil? Gentle? Godly? Talk together about how to develop code words or phrases to use when fighting fair.

While there are a couple of common issues that Eggerichs does not address, he does touch on many subjects his readers will appreciate (see below).

Chapter 1: And They Lived Happily Ever After . . . Not Necessarily
Chapter 2: Pink and Blue: Not Wrong, Just Different!
Chapter 3: Do You Have a Goodwilled Marriage?
Chapter 4: God Joined You Together, and He Will Keep You Together
Chapter 5: The 80:20 Ratio: The Secret to Appreciating Your Marriage
Chapter 6: Mistakes Happen—and Then What?
Chapter 7: Question: What Is Love? Answer: C-O-U-P-L-E
Chapter 8: Question: What Is Respect? Answer: C-H-A-I-R-S
Chapter 9: Newton’s Law: The Crazy Cycle in Action
Chapter 10: He Loves Us Because He Loves Us Because He Loves Us!
Chapter 11: Her Pink plus His Blue Equals God’s Purple
Chapter 12: It’s All About Perspective
Chapter 13: Those Who Pray Together Learn to Love & Respect Together
Chapter 14: Who Is on Your Mental Committee?
Chapter 15: To Tell the Truth . . . Is Not Always Easy
Chapter 16: Feelings Aren’t Facts—Always Sort It Out
Chapter 17: What Is Really Going on Here?
Chapter 18: John Wooden: A Love & Respect Legacy for the Ages
Chapter 19: Forget the Negative Snapshots—Enjoy the Positive Movie
Chapter 20: Sex and Affection: A Two-Way Street
Chapter 21: Keep Your Eyes on the Lord, Not the Problem
Chapter 22: Our “Good” May Be Willing, but Our Flesh Can Be Weak
Chapter 23: Excuse Me, Is that Your Foot on My Air Hose?
Chapter 24: It’s Hard to Be Negative While Being Thankful
Chapter 25: Don’t Believe Everything Your Spouse Says (Especially in Anger)
Chapter 26: Forgiveness, Part I: Love & Respect Takes Two Good Forgivers
Chapter 27: Forgiveness, Part II: Got Forgiveness? Let Jesus Be Your Model
Chapter 28: No Matter How You Feel, Trust Scripture More Than Your Feelings
Chapter 29: Remember, God Designed Your Spouse— Be Patient!
Chapter 30: Impact Others with Love & Respect
Chapter 31: Mutual Submission, Sex, and Tuesday Night
Chapter 32: Anger Can Be Dangerous . . . Handle with Care
Chapter 33: All Things Do Work Together for Good . . . Sooner or Later
Chapter 34: Do You Seek to Understand or Only Want to Be Understood?
Chapter 35: It Is All About Me, After All
Chapter 36: Who Makes the First Move in Your Marriage?
Chapter 37: To Overcome the Past, Focus on the Prize
Chapter 38: Is My Response Always My Responsibility?
Chapter 39: Look! Just Over Your Spouse’s Shoulder! It’s Jesus!
Chapter 40: If Only We Didn’t Have Money Problems
Chapter 41: Your Spouse Has Needs Only You Can Fill
Chapter 42: But Is Your Spouse Supposed to Meet All Your Needs?
Chapter 43: Your Children Are Watching
Chapter 44: I Am Not Being Defensive!
Chapter 45: How Positive Are You with Each Other?
Chapter 46: Do You Ever Play the Blame Game?
Chapter 47: Groupthink Can Be Toxic to Your Marriage
Chapter 48: Do You Know How to Fight Fair?
Chapter 49: Your Words Reveal Your Heart
Chapter 50: Why We All Need Respect
Chapter 51: Plug into the Power of Optimism
Chapter 52: When It’s All Been Said and Done

Disclosure: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 [...] “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

“Sex trafficking victims reveal horror of witchcraft and torture being used to enslave women in Scotland“

Assuming it’s true — and I have no reason not to think it isn’t — it’s so heart-breaking and horrific.

FML

One “victim had been trafficked from Africa and was only prostituted in Scotland. She was trafficked by a trusted community member she turned to after witnessing the murder of her parents and grandparents by the police.”

In case you skimmed over that too fast:
– She was kidnapped by “a trusted community member”
– After WATCHING her parents and grandparents murdered
– Her parents and grandparents were murdered by the police
– Then she was dragged away from loved ones to another continent
– She was forced to be a sex-slave

WT…

Why is God is willing to let such terrible things happen?
Why is God so patient with horrible people?
Why has God given people so much free will that they can think of doing those things?
How can God put up with it?

Someone might suggest God doesn’t care, is emotionally detached, or too busy. Nothing could be further from the truth. God looks forward to the day when “they will recognize how hurt I am by their unfaithful hearts and lustful eyes.” 1

As bad as it looks now, it’s not hopeless.

PTL

Every generation has selfish, stubborn, cruel people. For the slaves, the slave traders, for Christians, Muslims, Witches, Atheists, Agnostics, for me and for you there is hope.

“(In their heartache and humility) they will hate themselves for all their detestable sins……Put all your rebellion behind you, and find yourselves a new heart and a new spirit.” 2

Fortunately, it’s not all up to us.  We don’t have to search for a surgeon on Health Grades or MDNationwide, or RateMDs, God prompts us to look for some spiritual doctoring and provides the heart surgery:

“I will give them singleness of heart and put a new spirit within them. I will take away their stony, stubborn heart and give them a tender, responsive heart.” 3

Slave traders need heart surgery, and so do you and I.

1 – Ezekiel 6:9
2 – Ezekiel 6:9; 18:31
3 – Ezekiel 3:10

He was born to a young unmarried woman he never knew.
He was given up for adoption.
He was without parents until he was adopted when he was six weeks old.
He was without a mom – at five years old his adopted mom died.
He was without a dad – when he dad traveled around looking for work.

He did have a grandmother who modeled and taught him important life lessons.

No one would have predicted that a teen, who grew up poor with a troubled childhood and a limited education, would build a worldwide corporation and become incredibly wealthy.

Dreamers Don’t Let Circumstances Provide Excuses

Dave Thomas settled in Fort Wayne, Indiana when moved in with his dad. When he was fifteen years old he dropped out of high school to work full-time. When his dad prepared to move again Dave stayed behind and moved into a YMCA.

While working at a restaurant Dave met Colonel Sanders, founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken (now KFC) and the man who became one of the greatest influences in his life.

When he was thirty years old Dave had a chance to turn around four failing KFC restaurants in Columbus, Ohio. Four years later, by using his experience, determination and hard work the failing KFC became profitable and Dave Thomas became a millionaire.

Dave Thomas explained that “(I had) a chance to live the life I want and work to make my dreams come true. We should never take our freedoms for granted, and we should seize every opportunity presented to us.”

When he was a child, Dave dreamed of opening a hamburger restaurant. It took until he was thirty-seven until his dreams became a reality.

How?

HARD WORK and determination.

“With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable,” wrote the 18th century British philanthropist Thomas Foxwell Buxton.

FYI – Dave Thomas considered dropping out of high school the greatest mistake of his life.

More tomorrow about what helped Dave Thomas — a high school dropout — become a millionaire.

1 – Dave Thomas bio available on wendys.com</strong>

2 – Dave’s Way by Dave Thomas

I don’t believe on New Years resolutions I believe in doing. Yesterday I challenged you to give yourself the gift of ambition.

This year apply that renewed ambition to give yourself the gift of learning something new.

The Gift of Learning

Everyone I know wants to learn something.
Everyone I know pushes aside some of those dreams.

I know, you’re busy.
Fight off your excuses.

I know you’re tired.
Fight off your laziness.

I know you’re distracted from your goals.
Fight off your learned time-wasters like TV, video games, Facebook, etc.

I know you’re afraid that t won’t be worth it.
Don’t be afraid you don’t have to get a grade.

Take a big step or a small step.

Small Steps:

Search 5min for a quick five-minute education.
Search youtube for for something you’d like to learn about.

Bigger Steps:

You can get a wonderful education for free!   Here are links to great Universities:

Massachusetts Institute of Technology

Stanford

U-Cal Berkeley classes are available on itunes, youtube and via webcast.

and there are several other options from other U.S. schools.

International Education

Would you like an international education?

How about Open University in Great Britain?

Or, maybe an Australian education from University of Southern Queensland?

They all have free classes available.

This new year give yourself a gift; the gift of education.

Don’t get me wrong, we had a peaceful and blessed Christmas week, it was just different than in the past.

Perilous Presents

If our family and friends depended on me knowing their interests and needs they would never get anything.  Whether I’m being frugal or I’m ignorant, I simply don’t know what people like.

Even the people I eat pizza with every month or so I don’t remember their preferences.

I enjoy the presents I get, but, honesty, I almost always enjoy giving more.

International Blessings

Jesus Christ said that when we bless the poor it’s like “you were doing it for me!” 1

I just had to learn how.

A few years ago Steve Peterson and Mark Thompson inspired me to see the value in micro-financing.  Opportunity International, one of the micro-financing organizations we support “provides small business loans, savings, insurance and training to … people working their way out of poverty in the developing world.”

When I give micro-financing gifts I spread the joy of Christmas around the world.

My favorite presents that I gave weren’t big — $20-$45 — but they helped bring hope:

- In Amy’s name — through Christian Aid — Ronnie Tun in Burma helps people trapped in sex slavery find hope. Ronnie, like my son Josh, worked as a mechanic and has a great heart. I knew Amy would love to support his work in Burma.

- In Josh’s name — through Opportunity International — Rafael Vega Lopez, a Columbian man, could buy additional supplies for his fast food restaurant.  Josh likes fast food!

- Tayler is Josh’s's gf. In Tayler’s name — through Kiva — Jane from Kenya could buy some more fish for her fish farm.  Tayler cares about the needs of women even across the planet.

- In Shannon’s name — through Kiva — I donated enough money for Cristhian Maricela Garcia of Nicaragua to buy clothing, silver, and cosmetic merchandise for her store.  Shannon loves watching people’s prayers get answered and their dreams come true.

Sacrificing Selfishness

Generosity came easier when  I realized how blessed I’ve been.  I also had to learn to see the needs of others.  Then I had to believe — as Seth Gobin wrote in his book Tribes — that “anyone who wants to make a difference can!” 

Fun Stuff

The present I received that I think about the most is the handheld scanner I still can’t figure out.

Amy kinda bought herself a present for Christmas.  She bought The Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess game for the Wii.  It’s funny how much she loves that game!

How about you?
Did you get to give any presents you were excited to give?
Get any gifts that you’re excited that you got?

1 – Matthew 25:40

While it was not a permanent departure from her life in Minnesota, it was a significant life transition.

I asked her, “How do you gamble losing all that?“

Erica smiled with a slight shrug, “The only thing that comes to mind is that I trusted God with it completely.”

Knowing her as well as I do I had an idea what she meant, but I pressed for more details. “I think it came out of so many years of God asking me to do things that were challenging. I’m amazed at God’s faithfulness. I had already known and trusted God with my life this was just another (decision to trust God with).”

This week millions will celebrate Christmas. Most of us will exchange presents, but it’s the notion of the presence of God that is most compelling when I think about Christmas.

Historical documents explain that God became incarnate and came to the Earth.

Erica is gambling that God still interacts with people. While biographers quote Jesus Christ’s conversations with family, friends, and enemies, Erica believes that God still speaks today.

She gambles. She believes.
– She believes God still speaks.
– She believes that you and I could hear from God.
– She believes that you and I could discern what God was in and what God was not in.

While it’s a gamble to leave everything behind Erica found that God met her needs.
– Even when she got ill.
– Even when she was too sick to get out of bed.
– Even when she found scorpions in her room.
– Even when she found a scorpion IN her bed

Humbly Erica adds, “I know God gifted me. I know God anointed me. I knew God would give me what I need each day.”

For Erica her faith in an unseen God who does not speak with a spoken voice is not a gamble, it’s a way of life.

How About You?

What gamble have you been talked out of and you wish that you had done?
What gamble might you be willing to take?