Posted on Thursday, September 27, 2012
in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Values
This week we’re examining painful dating. Tuesday’s For Crying Out Loud included grief, loss, and the healing benefits of tears. Wednesday included helpful hints for dealing with being dumped.
“Last night — at a party — a guy I’ve had a huge crush on told my best friend that he liked me too. This morning I sent him a text message telling him how excited I was. Before he replied I caught up to my best friend. She didn’t know what I was talking about. I dreamed it all, EXCEPT for the embarrassing text I really sent my crush.“
That would be embarrassing!
Embarrassing is one thing, but to blunder in a costly way is out and out painful.
“After months and months of thoughtful consideration I finally asked my best friend to be my girlfriend. She looked stunned. She reached up, grabbed her head and mumbled, “No! I feel like I lost my best friend and the best girlfriend I’ll ever have in one second.“
What can you do after a blunder?
What could you do after it feels like you chased someone away?
Guard Your Heart
– Move slowly. In your grief and pain don’t jump into another relationship.
– Trust slowly. Withhold an important secret until a trusted friend confirms it’s safe.
– Be safe. Set consistent and firm boundaries.
– Be cautious. Don’t chase someone who doesn’t respond to your texts or phone calls.
– Avoid unrealistic expectations.
– If the person seems perfect, you’re probably misinformed.
– You won’t find who you’re looking for if you don’t look carefully.