Posted on Wednesday, September 5, 2012
in Emotional, How To, Relational, Social, Spiritual, Values
Fully Alive by Ken Davis challenges us to step out of our comfort zones, and yesterday as part of being fully alive we discussed the importance of making friends and building deep friendships.
You Can’t Fake Being Fully Alive
“You can fool people for a while, but eventually they will know. And you can never fool yourself.
Being alive is more than simply looking fluffed up and combed out on the outside. It’s a matter of attitude. And that comes from the inside. Approaching…challenges with the right attitude is the first and most important step you can take. Your attitude will launch your dreams or bury them.”
1. Banish the spirit of fear
2. Fail quickly. Get it over with!
3. Count the cost and pay off!
If it’s true that “pain is part of the price of living,” let’s examine one of those painful decisions with a rewarding payoff.
Banish The Spirit Of Fear
“Few things can short-circuit your effort to live fully alive as much as the fear of failure. This fear will affect your ability (will affect most every area of your life and) negatively influence every relationship you have.”
As Davis explained, “I spent much of my time feeling miserable because nothing I did was perfect. I painted pictures no one ever saw; I wrote letters I never sent; I planned trips I never took. If I couldn’t do it to perfection, I gave up, and I certainly wasn’t willing to make any imperfect projects public. In my mind, imperfection was failure.”
I hate failure. I hate and fear feeling a sense of rejection even more, but not being a perfectionist, it’s hard to understand what a perfectionist goes through.
Davis explains, “I struggle with attitude more than almost anything else. Not only am I a perfectionist, but I tend to look at everything from the negative side first.” For example:
– When I’m speaking and someone leaves the room, I wonder what I said wrong?
– If a 1000 people complimented I’ll obsess over the one who walked by without a word.
– I know can’t be 100% positive, (but) I want to be perceived as a positive person.
The burden of our attitude can be a light blessing, or can be a weighty burden.
“G. K. Chesterton said, ‘Anything worth doing is worth doing badly.’ Chesterton wasn’t encouraging mediocrity; he was alerting his audience to an important truth: if you wait to do something until you can do it perfectly, you will never do it. Give it your best shot now. Learn from your mistakes, and then do it better the next time. That’s called growth.”
While I hated weeding and regular garden maintenance I grew up wanting the benefits of a garden, but sadly I felt like I had a “black thumb.” If I stayed stuck in my failures and fears we would never have the beautiful gardens that we have today.
“Perfection is a goal to pursue, not a requirement for living”, wrote Davis, and now it’s mysilentscream.