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Nov 16

A Week At Fifty

Posted on Friday, November 16, 2012 in Emotional, Relational, Social, Values

This week I was asked several times about turning fifty.

I was asked by twenty-somethings who now realized that I was twice as old as them. The gap that seemed more about experience than age now felt a little different.

I was asked by thirty-somethings who wondered aloud how old fifty seemed, but asked silently, “What will I be like when I’m fifty?” 

Turning 20

Twenty was the year I was going to school full-time, and working full-time, but I was spinning my wheels. When I turned twenty I had yet to make some healthy changes in my life, and the future didn’t look bright.

Looking back on turning twenty, it was six month later in the spring when the catalysts of change began to cause their reactions. Changes were coming.  I was starting to grow up.

Turning 30

“It’s funny”, I said, “turning thirty was so much better than turning twenty.”

Turning 30 I was happily married with two great kids and a job I loved.

With hindsight, I can now see we were trying to be happily married, but I was in the depth of my workaholic days. And, those great kids were also greatly energetic and their less energetic mom was wearing down from carrying most of the load.

Amy deserved better.  My kids deserved more of me.  I couldn’t see it yet.

Turning 40

“Forty felt older than thirty,” I said pausing, “but not much more.”

Turning forty was different than turning thirty. Of course, forty seemed older than thirty, but it seemed more like “30-10,” than another decade older.

Fortunately I was even more happily married, and those two great kids were now twelve and ten; such great ages to be a kid and be a dad.  As I turned forty I was in a good place in life.

Turning 50

My love for my wife is even stronger. Those young children I had when I was thirty are now young adults.

The smile-filled daughter still smiles, but now she bring smiles out in others whose frowns seemed permanent. She used to fill our home with joy, but until December she’ll being bring smiles to folks in Colorado.  We’re looking forward to her return.  Skyping and phone calls are just not the same as laughing and talking in the same room.

Remember that twenty year old I described myself as, well, my son is now the twenty year old going to school full-time, and working full-time.

I was spinning my wheels at twenty, my son is full-speed ahead. He’s successful at his job and looking forward to becoming a firefighter. While I had yet to make some healthy changes in my life, my son has, and his future looks bright.

Looking Back While Looking Ahead

I’m excited to say that I still have the same job I had when I was turning thirty.

This last weekend my birthday party gave me a wonderful perspective on life from thirty to fifty.

My house was filled with people newborn to sixty.

Those teens I worked with at thirty are now older than I was then, they’re in their thirties many of them married with children. Some of them now with teens of their own.

Those teens I worked with at forty are now young adults. Some with blossoming dreams, others blooming with young families of their own.

And, a couple of the teens I currently work with came over. What a blessing! Three generations of TreeHouse teens gathered in one place.

Fifty feels older than twenty, or thirty, or forty, but in many ways I’m happier than I’ve ever been.

Bring on the comments

  1. I loved reading this, thanks Scott!

  2. Thanks so much!
    It was interesting to think through.
    I thought people would want to read it.

  3. Awh that touched my heart Scott! That is so true you really do love your family and extended TH family!You and I as well, have been truly blessed to be part of you and your families life for all these years!I can relate as I told you at your party, all thoughs years of me not liking to follow my parents rules and now myself as a 30something parent I am the rules!:) and I did my fair share of workaholic buseness last year that ended me up in the hospital for 10days away from what mattered most to me….my beautiful loving daughters

  4. Because I was being selfish without realizing it. Thinking that being financially stable with 2 jobs was mre impotrant than my fiance’ and my girls whom both resented my tired and crabby personality and I neglected my health as well to the point I could of died because of the infection rageing in my body and the disease that was distroying me. And you know who I was thinking about You and God….I know crazy right? I prayed and prayed after I got my bearings back after the first couple of days that if God got me through this I would go to church and join a congregation ,which I did

  5. Because I was being selfish without realizing it. Thinking that being financially stable with 2 jobs was mre impotrant than my fiance’ and my girls whom both resented my tired and crabby personality and I neglected my health as well to the point I could of died because of the infection rageing in my body and the disease that was distroying me. And you know who I was thinking about You and God….I know crazy right? I prayed and prayed after I got my bearings back after the first couple of days that if God got me through this I would go to church and join a congregation ,which I did and get back in contact with the people in my life that were most important influence in my life which where God, My fiance’ my children and you! Thank You again for bringing such wisdom and grace into my life!

  6. Thank you Jenny for you kind words.
    We also appreciate your humility in sharing those challenging times with us.

  7. I admire your faithfulness to keep your word.
    It’s a great challenge to all of us to keep our promises!

  8. I’m grateful for your kind words.
    It’s been God, the Bible and patient people who support me too. <3

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